Emerging Adulthood Woes
17 May 2012 Leave a Comment
in Home, No Expectations Tags: 2012, Awareness, Blogging, Individuality, Life in a New Land, Pink!, Pressure, Soul Searching, Youth
In my process of maturing I have come in to terms with a few things in life. Or maybe a lot, but not that all of it matters to this post any way.
I would like to blame it on education and living away, since we all like playing the blame game and not taking responsibility for our actions – for a few changes in me seen within the last two-three years.
I am quieter. Not entirely quiet, I do still talk a fair amount, yet I don’t get yelled at to shut it, as I did some years into my teenage life. I think it’s a good thing. Besides being now looked at as a “lady” – total Win – Being quiet has its advantages and so far, that is all I see. This has resulted in me being more observant and thus guiding me in my formation of opinions of people, situations, conflicts – yes I could be judgemental but it should be kept in mind that I also have the ability to see both sides of the story.
I also apply my little knowledge of psychology to things around me. While they do say that a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, so as far as I’m concerned, my diagnosis of myself, is fine and to some extent stands true! Besides the usual traces of Schizophrenia I do also see the applicability of the development characteristics seen in respective age categories that I or someone else belong to.
Now comes the idea of displacement. (Hang me for having thought of it before as projection. I seem to have gotten my Freud all over the place.) Now I think and I believe that I do practice displacement. I do channel my anger, frustration and those unexpressed feelings and etcetera in my subconscious to more socially accepted methods, in my case: cooking, writing, cleaning / house keeping – to an extent oft labelled compulsive. I may not be necessarily kickass at any of these but that’s not really the point. This displacement has also made me enjoy these tasks. At times I write for fun or cook when I’m bored.
I predict a very happy life ahead. Hopefully one with money, lots of shoes and a sustained sense of social responsibility.
The Ex Factor
07 Dec 2011 3 Comments
in Home, No Expectations Tags: 2011, Feminism, First-timers, Gender Equality, Individuality, Pink!
Suddenly, I feel like Carrie Bradshaw with a double take on the good sex part. Probably due to the new found affiliation to “Sex and the City” I begin looking at relationships and my girlfriends in a new light – ladies, you needn’t be petrified now.
Most girls I know, since my school years to date, have that one guy who has left that one scar – usually bad – that has impacted them greatly despite having broken up years ago. Most of my guy friends however, do not suffer from this. Maybe I don’t know enough guys well enough to pass this judgement, nonetheless of the ones that I do know, I don’t see it in their faces. The girls on the other hand – no we are not looking for a sympathy vote here – have a scar, in their heart or wherever they say that hurts the most that undoubtedly shows in their face and the times they space out not to the future and how things would be like five years from now but to those moments with what’s-his-name.
In attempting not to be feminist – which I am not by now, at least not an extremist – I can’t help but think to myself, why women? Why is it that our kind end up with all this suffering? Is it because biologically we are emotionally stronger and therefore have the capacity to uphold such trauma or is it because we are supposedly stronger otherwise too as a result of the XX combination.
Maybe it does come down to biology. We have the XX factor. Boys have the XY. Bastards have one less (e)X to worry about.
Freud said that anatomy is destiny. Guess he at least got that theory correct.
One of Those Days
02 Oct 2011 Leave a Comment
in Home, No Expectations Tags: 2011, All Smiles, Blissfully Beautiful, Blogging, Faith, Islam, Mera Sixty-Deka Duith, Pink!, Rejuvenation of the Renaissance, Youth
It’s rare. Those days that make you feel as though there is absolutely no care in the world – in a good way – and feel as though, yes I’m going to say it, “Top of the world!” These days are ones that are of absolute happiness.
My Literature teacher told me that happiness is brought about by the awareness of the consequences of that particular circumstance – if that made sense to anyone who is reading 
Not that all is going brilliantly for me: I have my exams in a week, the Production is well, – those of you know the story I needn’t say more – I am losing weight at an unfathomable rate, I leave to Goa in twenty-days and Dubai in a few months and I love my family and my best friends too much and the list goes on.
However, it all comes down to the fact that regardless of me knowing that all this is happening, both good and bad, I am still thankful to God – regardless of as to where my faith stands as at now – for what He has given me thus far and for all that He continues to bless me with.
So while the day lasts, it’s time to work – if you feel like it – listen to Katy Perry, dance till your ass refuses to move no more and be grateful for everything and everyone around you.
To Mama, With Love
26 Jul 2011 4 Comments
in Home, Personal Profiles Tags: 2011, All Smiles, Blissfully Beautiful, Blogging, Feminism, Home&Co., Pink!, Sri Lanka, Women, Women In Islam
Dear Mama,
This post has been coming a while, however I was in question as to how it must be framed. Thus I thought, what better and easier way than a letter? It’s not one of those reply-me ones, but rhetorical to a great extent.
As I said, this has been a long time coming. I cannot thank you enough for what you have given me and on the same lines, I cannot but cringe at those moments I always cried for more. Among Akki’s and my friends you were always nicknamed the “coolest”. However to Akki and I, you are beyond being merely “cool”.
Looking back at my twenty-one years, of which I remember around fifteen, more or less, I’ve seen a woman who has risen to a height in terms of her family and now her career. We are indeed proud to be your daughters.
I always think to myself especially at those times when I ask you something and you answer, ‘Would I be able to answer all the questions my daughters ask me?’ The most common response blinks in front of me: Google. However, what’s amazing about Mama and her generation is that they never needed Google. Now I wouldn’t even know how to write my research paper without it. I am a core tech-buff, I agree, whole heartedly. However, the picture of me educating my child on puberty with a reader on my palm, headset on my ear and a constant eye on the laptop laying on top of the coffee table in front of me awaiting that very email, [Heaven forbid what other technological developments would be available fifteen years from now] does not seem too appealing.
Mama, you would not believe how truly grateful I am about you not turning Akki and I into book-worm. Even if you attempted so, I sincerely doubt that we would’ve been any good at it. What you did was very commendable and looking back at it, prudent. Our Mama did not cut off our allowances or give us less food or do something that would be considered a “punishment” if we were to horrible at our exams. One of the reasons we did not do all that bad was because, she had faith in us that we would do our best, and indeed we did, attempted to or at least tried not to fail Being in University now I am glad I do not have the pressure being haloed over me and as a result of which am able to partake in everything my now-weakening flesh and bones allow me to.
Mama, you taught me how to cook. Rather, I observed and learnt to cook looking at you make all those yummy dishes. Dammit. I want beef.
This letter would be incomplete if I don’t add a realistic touch to it and tell you Mama that you need to work on your patience. Yes you do have patience, I agree, having brought up to unruly monkeys like Akki and I all by yourself. However, you don’t have enough patience to teach me to drive nor teach me to read Arabic. LoL.
With that, I would like to say thank you once again. For bringing us in to this world. For raising us to be responsible children. For teaching us that we don’t need a man to get through in life. For finding yourself a charity-buddy, always-friend-in-need and others’-first, me-last man.
All the best in all you do Mama. We will be there with you every step of the way.
Love,
Akki and Nangi
Importance of Being Pink
03 Jul 2011 Leave a Comment
in Home, No Expectations Tags: 2011, All Smiles, Blissfully Beautiful, First-timers, Kill All Boys :), Mera Sixty-Deka Duith, Pink!, Understanding The Opposite Sex, Women, Youth
This post has derived from watching one too many flicks and listening to too many sappy songs. Those very movies that makes you go “Aww” and shed a tear at the end of it all, upon the female protagonist finally being united with her soul mate or the most good looking actor in the story. After which, you lie on your bed and contemplate of what you’ve seen and put yourself in her shoes. In terms of music it is those very songs that start to make more sense to after some boy has succeeded in making you his captive audience.
Being a girl I will blatantly admit that I like watching flicks. They make me happy and yes I do go “aww” – silently – and shed tears, lots of them depending on my hormonal functioning at that moment *LoL*
I like them better when I can relate to it. In other words, when the movie actually depicts my social life or relationship(s). Oh, that is when the actual fun starts. You put yourself in the shoes of the heroine or female protagonist and imagine… let’s not go there.
Once the movie is over, you meet and greet girlfriends who have already watched it and recommend it to those who haven’t. Discuss it over coffee, dinner and skype; in the midst of all this, external storage devices are madly passed between one another during class, malls, slid under doors and through some random boy acting as a messenger. This is followed by downloading theme songs and sending it to one another and the flick gains popularity.
Once in a way when the content becomes very applicable to a real life situation, you try to get that boy of yours to have a look see in to it, and oh! fail miserably. Chances are that if you make them watch it with you, they would only fall asleep.
Boyfriends are important in the am-I-straight check-list. But girlfriends and room mates, flicks, chocolate, pink and a little bit of blonde-ness are more important.
